Women's English:
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
I'm sorry = You'll be sorry
We need = I want
It's your decision =
The correct decision
should be obvious by now
Do what you want =
You'll pay for this later
We need to talk =
I need to complain
Sure go ahead =
I don't want you to
I'm not upset =
Of course I'm upset, you moron!
You're so manly =
You need a shave and you sweat a lot
Be romantic, turn out the lights =
I have flabby thighs
This kitchen is so inconvenient =
I want a new house
I want new curtains =
and carpeting, and furniture,
and wallpaper
I heard a noise =
I noticed you were almost asleep
Do you love me? =
I'm going to ask for something
expensive
How much do you love me? =
I did something today
you're going to hate
I'll be ready in a minute =
Kick off your shoes
and find a good game on TV
You have to learn to
communicate = Just agree with me
Are you listening to me!? =
[Too late, you're dead]
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Men's English:
I'm hungry = I'm hungry
I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy
I'm tired = I'm tired
Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd
eventually like to have sex with you
Can I call you sometime? =
I'd eventually like to have sex with you
May I have this dance? = I'd eventually
like to have sex with you
Nice dress! = Nice cleavage!
You look tense, let me give
you a massage = I want to fondle you
What's wrong? = What stupid
self inflicted psychological
trauma is it now?
What's wrong? = I guess sex
tonight is out of the question
I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?
I love you = Let's have sex now!
I love you, too = Okay, I said it,
Now can we have sex
Yes, I like the way you cut your hair =
I liked it better before
Let's talk = I'll impress you by showing
you I am a deep guy then maybe sex?
Will you marry me? = I want to make
it illegal for you to have sex with others
I don't think that blouse and that
skirt go well together = I'm gay |
